Comparing

I'm not close to any of my cousins. I wish I were but I'm not.

I don't have many on my dad's side and the ones I do have are not close to my age.

I have a bunch on my mom's side, mostly all older. But the ones that are my age I'm not close to at all.

You see, since we were born, everyone would and does compare me to them, them to me. {Every one but my parents. They didn't stand up to it either. It's a tricky place to be in, I don't blame them, they didn't want to step on any ones toes.}

You can't have relationships...or real ones anyways, with people who compare. It just doesn't work.

Austin has LOTS of cousins. And he's close to all of them pretty much. Some of his best friends are his cousins. And sometimes I catch myself envying him and those relationships. But unfortunately the potential for relationships with mine were crushed the moment comparing started.

Comparing annoys the crap out me. I can't stand people who have to one up you, be better than others, and compare. I know that my annoyance stems from being compared to my cousins. You'd think that family would be the last place for that to happen. I've never been able to figure out why people can't just be happy with themselves, why we can't accept that everyone is different and that's ok. Drives me nuts. Life isn't about being better than others, it's about being the best you.

The hard one for me is when it happens with Bridger. I know that I will not stand for it when it comes to his cousins/friends. Toes will not matter when it comes down to my children's feelings. It's not right to compare yourself to others, it's definitely not right to compare your children with others. What does that teach them? What does that do for you?

I really wish that someone long ago would have realized that when it came to me and my cousins. I would like to be able to call my cousins my best friends but I can't and that's sad. Don't get me wrong we don't hate each other, we talk and still value the fact that we're family...but that's were it ends.